My guy is piling on the kilos

Dear Diana,
I have been seeing this guy for a while and he really cares for me. He is honest and forthright. He loves me and cares for me like no one else. My only problem is that he is on the heavier side and in the last few months he has been piling on the kilos even more. I always look at his huge body and wonder how he will look a year away.u00a0 I love him, but I wish he can lose some weight. How do I motivate him to knock off the inches? When I go out with my pals, they tell me how is the Mr Fatso or your teddy bear. I get hurt and want to help me. As I am slender, we now look like Laurel and Hardy!u00a0
- Harneeti


Illustration/Satish Acharya

Dear Harneeti,
It is clear from your letter that he has been piling on the kilos since the past year. When you'll started going around, he was not at all fat. So find out what made him go on the binge. Get a medical check up done first. Accordingly he will be put on to a dietician who can guide him in his food intake. At the same time he can start with some exercises or walks. Remember gaining weight is easy but losing it is tough. So it will take time and you need lots of patience. You can encourage him and motivate him but don't nag him about his weight. You say he loves you, I am sure he willu00a0 try hard to fight the flab.

I am depressed...

Dear Diana,
I am 27 years old and have been married for five years. I had a miscarriage a year after marriage and again last month. This is causing me great anguish and making me depressed. Will I ever be able to conceive?u00a0
- MK

Dear MK,
First of all, if you are going to be tensed and depressed, it will affect your health which in turn might affect child-bearing. You need to follow what your gynecologist tells you. Remember you are 27 so it is not that your biological clock is ticking. Do not think too much about it, follow your doc's advise and take care of your health.
How do I get to know her?

Dear Diana,
My family has found a girl for me. I am 26 and she is 24. I have met her only twice when we visited her home along with my folks. Now there is serious talk of having an engagement. I am scared as I barely know the girl. How do I know if she is the right choice for me. She works in a store, should I make the move to get to know her before committing myself?
-u00a0Avinash

Dear Avinash,
My dear man, what are you afraid of? You say you do not know her and how can you get hitched to her. So what do you do? Pick up the cellphone and call her. Be very casual in your conversation and see how things go, then perhaps you can tell her to meet you at a coffee shop. Chances are that she will also want to know you. If she is uncomfortable, she can get a friend along for the first meeting. Go slow and get to know the girl. I am sure she is as eager to get to know you.